Make It Last
You have thirty seconds to make a first impression on every person you meet. In those fleeting seconds, you are sized up. Your intelligence, socioeconomic background, social abilities, emotional stability, integrity, and competence are all determined at that time. Not only that, but those first impressions usually stick and become lasting impressions.
Your associate's or client's opinion of you will probably not change; how he views you right now is how he'll view you from now on. It sounds unreal yet it's true. A respected lawyer friend of mine said that the first thirty seconds are critical in influencing a jury. I hope that's not the only means by which a verdict is rendered. Knowing the importance those seconds have will make all the difference in what you do with them and what verdict others give you.
What Really Matters
So in that short time, what really happens? You are sized up and down from the clothes you wear including your shoes to your hair, your body language, and how you speak. Even the sound of your voice and the words you use tell your business associate or client who you are and how you think and if you think at all. Your grooming, your smell, your carriage and yes, even your fingernails are all transmitters of information. And your handshake also packs a wallop.
The Handshake
Not only do you need to take charge of your business, you need to reel in your body and make it work for you. Are you slouching? Is your handshake limp? You don't want to come across as a push-over with a limp handshake nor do want to overpower someone with a tight grip that demonstrates the need to control. You need to show confidence and warmth and that you can be effective, successful and the right person for any responsibility. And all this with one handshake!
To other people, you appear confident and successful when you deliver a firm handshake and you move decisively. For a female, it's trickier. Not too tight or you're behaving like a man, or too controlling. Too loose and you are at the mercy of your emotions or hormones and thus unpredictable or indecisive.
Keeping up Appearances
Dressing for success sounds trite yet it works to position you in business. Your wardrobe can convey confidence, professionalism, pride and positive self-esteem or the opposite. Your client learns about you before you even open your mouth to speak. She learns that you value yourself because you take time to look good. Your client may consider that if you value you, maybe you'll treat her and her business interests with value also.
The way you look signals your business associate how you take care of details.
How do you feel in your clothes? Are you wiggling or do you look like someone in a very starched and uncomfortable collar? These show your ease and competence. They also convey how well you can be trusted. Remember none of this may really be true, but it doesn't matter. What the other person sees, he believes. From that moment on whenever you are seen, that belief comes into play.
You Are the Message
Are you seen as successful or unsuccessful? Are you approachable or aloof? You need to know what messages you give off. Figure out if they're in line with what you want to communicate. If they're not and if you're really serious about getting ahead, you have to change them. It doesn't matter if you're the most competent and confident person on the planet. If you don't relay that message, no one will believe it. To be successful you have to be seen and heard the way you choose or you won't be heard at all.
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